


Freaky on Camera

by VelocityKilljoy



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, M/M, Pining, camboy Rich Goranski, there was a gap in the market and i chose to fill it, we all love a good get together fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-23
Updated: 2020-03-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:01:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23270620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VelocityKilljoy/pseuds/VelocityKilljoy
Summary: College is great but Friday nights aren't all they're hyped up to be. Michael just wants to chill out and watch porn to pass the time, taking a chance by clicking on a camboy, and finds out that nothing he does in life comes without a curve-ball straight to the face.
Relationships: Rich Goranski/Michael Mell
Comments: 8
Kudos: 69





	Freaky on Camera

**Author's Note:**

> Since we're all locked up in quarantine, I thought I'd throw y'all thirsty expensive headphones fans some fresh food. I'm convinced that starting this fic is what broke my old laptop (rip ol' pal) and I really had no idea what how to write any of this (surprisingly I've never actually watched a cam person before) until I watched Cam the other day (great film, check it out if you have Netflix and like thrillers). So enjoy, my good people!
> 
> Edit: thank you to the person who pointed out that that JJ kinda seems like he could be Jeremy. He isn’t and I legit only just realised it could be interpreted like that so yeah, sorry if that’s confusing, I just wanted to clear that up (it’s a random name I got from a generator bc I’m uninventive)

After the drama and craziness of high school, college seemed like it was going to be the breath of fresh air that Michael so badly needed. So that was, of course, the exact mentality that got him in over his head. As usual.

Summer vacation had been great. The whole squad were together most of the time and everyone had felt their freedom full force. Then, when it came time for everyone to go their separate ways, they had spent one last night camping out in Michael’s basement, bags packed in the hall. Jake, Christine, and Brooke were all going out of state for college, Jenna had a place at a university in England, and Chloe was using half of her savings to go backpacking around Europe for a year. That left Michael, Jeremy, and Rich. They were staying fairly local, far enough away from home that they could consider themselves independent but close enough that they could drive home for the weekend if they needed to. They’d all been accepted into the same college too, all for different courses but on the same campus, nonetheless.

Having friends on campus was cool and all, but it didn’t always mean Michael had someone to hang out with. He had been right about more people being nice to him and Jeremy in college, but it turned out that he wasn’t too into mass social interaction. He just preferred to chill with friends. Jeremy, on the other hand, thrived at parties because of course he did, and Rich went to… not many but that understandable. Michael didn’t usually go because he hated parties passionately. Whether that was because of his anxiety or because of how Halloween went down in junior year, he wasn’t sure. All he knew was that the mix of big crowds, open substance abuse, and loud music wasn’t his current idea of fun. Putting that all together meant that Friday nights were the least interesting day of the week. Jeremy was at whichever party promised the most alcohol, Rich religiously kept Friday evenings as study evenings no matter how much anyone asked him to go out, and Michael stayed at home doing whatever. 

On one such Friday, Michael decided that ‘whatever’ meant busting out his laptop and opening his favourite porn site. It was mostly due to a lack of anything else to do. Sometimes he wished it was senior year again, and that the whole gang was back together, hanging out in Michael’s basement playing never-have-I-ever. Instead, he was forced to accept the inherent soullessness of Fridays. He could practically feel the popularity and productivity seeping out of his skin as he scrolled aimlessly down the site’s home page. Nothing particularly exciting stood out to him. It was all the same bullshit as usual and when he hit the bottom of the second page he groaned in defeat. He couldn’t even stay at home and watch porn successfully! What were Friday nights even for?

It was just when he was about to give up and just go to bed that a notification popped up on the site’s border. 

CAM BOYS: PyroTwunk going live in 1 minute

Out of pure curiosity, Michael clicked the link and waited. He’d never really been bothered with cam boys; it was like porn with all the pressure of social interaction. But there was nothing else and Michaels was bored and horny so why not? About thirty seconds of waiting passed and he realised he should probably find his headphones, just in case. He’d taken them off about an hour earlier when he had gotten back from work and they were sitting idly in his dorm’s living room. Reluctantly, he closed his laptop and dragged himself up to get them. His dorm was empty, thank goodness, but it didn’t make the trek any less awkward and inconvenient. When he got back, he settled down on his bed, unzipped his jeans, and plugged in his headphones before opening his laptop. The video had, unsurprisingly, already started and the guy on screen – PyroTwunk, apparently – was leaning over the camera, clearly fixing some technical issue Michael saw that someone pointed out in the chat. All Michael could see was part of the guy’s abs and a little bit leading up to his pecs, a black leather harness criss-crossing over the naked skin, and all Michael could think was ‘damn, he’s fucking jacked’. A peppy song played in the background, something Michael though might have heard before on the radio. And then PyroTwunk leant back and there was nothing that could prepare Michael for what he saw.

“Hey, is that any better?” 

Michael didn’t even acknowledge the string of affirmatives in the chat. He was solely focused on the cam boy. Broad shoulders, slim hips, planes of toned muscle, small gauge earrings, familiar tattoos, burn scars, and a streak of red through dark blonde hair. Fuck. FUCK. Michael was frozen in place, watching wide eyed as Rich flirted with the chat and teased the parts of him that were still covered. 

“Okay, I think we’re good to start.” Rich was kneeling in the centre of his bed, lowriding black jeans doing very little to resist the strain between his legs. He had a small selection of toys in front of him, each one either black or a shade of red and increasing in size along the line. Michael watched as Rich’s eyes darted back and forth, obviously reading from the chat. “Strip? Is that what you want? Hmm, let’s see if we can get to 100 dollars first.” Michael watched, enraptured, as Rich opened his legs slightly, sinking down into the sheets and grinding against them. He knew it was kind of creepy and super weird to be watching but damn, Rich looked so hot. The tip notifications started pinging rapidly. Someone tipped fifty dollars, others chipped in with tens and fives until Rich grinned and brought his hands down begin unfastening his jeans. Michael slipped his hand down the front of his own pants, stroking himself slowly.

“Good work babes! I knew you could do it.” With surprising elegance, Rich slipped his pants off, leaving him in only the bondage harness and, to Michael’s hesitant delight, a pair of black panties. They were in the same style as his harness with buckles and straps and Michael really felt gross for staring at his friend’s crotch so intently. Fucking hell, was his cock always that big? He shuddered, his own dick twitching as he touched himself, eyes still glued to the screen. 

“Is that what you wanted? No?” A devilish smile quirked at the corners of his mouth as his eyes scanned the chat off-screen. Michael let out a groan as Rich bucked his hips up and traced the line of his cock through his underwear, letting out a whine that rang out in HD through Michael’s headphones. “You’re going to have to wait a bit for that, honey. They say patience is a virtue, you know. Until then, how about we have a vote? My regulars will know the rules but in case we have some new faces, let’s have a little recap...” 

Michael listened to Rich’s spiel about prices on voting, each toy more expensive as they got bigger, and his eyes wandered to the chat. 

A_Jnsn tipped $50  
A_Jnsn: youre so hot for us  
Slayer4394: lets see how much u can take  
Slayer4394 tipped $100  
Slayer4394: ur so small itll break u  
CamFan30242: biggest. your going to get so wrecked  
JJ_the_cat: Take them off!!!  
CamFan30242 tipped $100

Messages came though quickly, tips pouring in as Michael’s eyes flicked back and forth between the chat and Rich. Everyone was so thirsty; it was unsettling to watch. Although, when he thought about it, he realised he wasn’t much better. He was harder than he remembered being in a long time, infinitely more turned on by the imprint of his close friend’s dick than he was by any of the other porn he’d ever watched. 

“C’mon guys! We need a winner already.” Within a few seconds, the chat was flooded with votes, most of which were in the realm of $100. On screen, Rich smirked. “Well then,” His hand hovered teasingly over the biggest toy, fingers brushing over it lightly before finally picking it up. “The people have spoken!”

It was enrapturing, watching Rich stroking it. Michael almost choked on his own tongue when Rich opened his mouth and started sucking the toy, big brown eyes looking up at the camera and dark eyelashes fluttering. It was the hottest thing on the planet, seeing Rich take it with practiced ease. Michael was sure he could see a bulge in Rich’s throat where he deepthroated it so far and it was almost enough to send him over the edge. Almost. He gritted his teeth and tightened his hand at the base of his cock to stop himself cumming too soon. 

After a few minutes, Rich pulled off. His lips were red and spit-slicked, and Michael couldn’t take his eyes off them. 

“Hmmm, I think it’s time for the main event.” He slipped a hand under the waistband of his panties, still looking up at the camera with a heavy gaze. “How much is that worth? How about another 500?”

The chat lit up with tips again, and Michael watched as new messages appeared. 

JJ_the_cat tipped $100  
West_coast.r tipped $20  
JJ_the_cat: take them off for me baby  
JJ_the_cat: my sexy boy  
A_Jnsn tipped $50  
JJ_the_cat: be good for me pyro  
A_Jnsn: yeah be a good boy

Michael read the messages, scanning the chat until he got to the series from JJ_the_cat. Something about them made his blood boil. Who did this guy think he was? Rich, who was reading the chat, just laughed.

“Oh yeah, I’ll be your good boy. So fucking good, just for you.” He bit his lip, eyes still directed offscreen. “Just a little more. C’mon. Who’s gonna tip the scales?”

In a moment of pure irrationality, Michael clicked the box at the side of the screen and hit enter. 

CodeRed tipped $150

While Michael definitely had a fair amount disposable income – freelance computer repairs for college students was a high paying business – he had no idea what possessed him to do what he had just done, other than a smug voice in his head that said ‘beat that, asshole’. 

Rich’s face lit up and Michael felt a swell of pride. He knew it was because of his tip. 

“Oh hello there. You’re new.” Rich said, leaning closer to see the chat better. “Welcome to the crew, Red. You’ve made a lot of people very happy.” He sat back, hands moving down his chest and to the buckles on the side of his panties. Unbuckling them slowly, Rich swayed in time with the music that was still playing in the background. Michael’s breath caught in his throat. All that was keeping the material up was Rich’s hands still clasped at the sides. “This one’s for you, Red.”

Fuck.

\--

“I just don’t get it Jeremy! It doesn’t make sense. Like, at all.” Michael groaned before taking a sip of his iced coffee. 

It was 2pm on a Saturday and they were at a coffee shop near campus, their usual routine.

“Suspension of disbelief, Michael! Creative licence. It needs to happen for the plot, dude.”

“I get that but seriously? No one is that stupid. Have you smelt drano? That shit is strong.” Jeremy banged his head on the table and Michael chuckled. “I’m just saying. Heather is far smarter than that.”

“Maybe she’s just really dumb when she’s hungover.” The voice came from behind Michael, but he recognised it immediately. “I know I am.”

Rich slumped into the seat next to Michael, slinging an arm around his shoulder as he leaned over to wrap his lips around the straw in Michael’s drink. Jeremy must have noticed the way that Michael went rigid because he shot him a concerned look. Rich seemed to have caught on too, side-eyeing Michael with one eyebrow quirked up.

“You good, bro?”

“Huh? Oh, right, Yeah, I’m fine. Just spaced out for a second.” Michael spluttered, brain still blue screening as Rich’s hand lingered on his shoulder. Rich definitely seemed concerned, worried eyes looking up at him in a way that sent Michael’s brain reeling. Jeremy cleared his throat awkwardly.

“He’s fine. Just stayed up too late trying to beat Apocalypse again.Right, dude?” 

Michael nodded halfheartedly. Rich didn’t seem entirely convinced but just shrugged.

“Fair enough.” He took another sip of Michael’s drink. “We going to the arcade or not?”

As they made their way out, Jeremy elbowed Michael and mouthed a ‘what the hell was that?’ And Michael didn’t have an answer.

\--

After the first incident, Michael decided he needed to reel it in big time. There was no way he could start acting weird around Rich just because of one video. He wasn’t going to make things weird. That was a promise. One that worked quite decently for a while, all things considered. It was easy enough to pretend things weren’t different; all he had to do was realise that nothing was actually different at all. Rich was still the exact same guy as before. It was just that now Michael knew what he looked and sounded like when he was getting fucked. And thought he was hot. Fuck. 

While he did manage to act marginally normally around Rich, it didn’t help the fact that Michael couldn’t get over what he’s seen in the livestream. Sure, he’d appreciated Rich before. It wasn’t like he just started being unfairly good looking; it wasn’t even that Michael hadn’t been interested before – he had been since senior year – but now it was just impossible to ignore. Every time Rich looked at him, it was like he had been hit in the stomach. Whenever Rich laughed, Michael found himself staring longingly. He was practically pining, and it was ridiculous. Michael had jumped straight off the cliff of no return. He had burned the bridge back to normality. It was his own fault and he knew it.

When Friday night rolled around again, Michael felt himself drawn back to the stream like he was a sailor and Rich’s eyes, his smile, his body, were the siren’s call pulling him into the throws of disaster.

“Hey you guys! Is my camera working better this week?”

\--

“Aw c’mon. Don’t be such a – ah! Don’t be such teases.” 

Rich was a mess, covered in cum and lube and spit, moaning sweetly as he rode the vibrator the chat had voted for. Michael sat on his own bed watching it all on his laptop.

CodeRed: you’re doing great, prettyboy  
CodeRed: you’re a star  
CodeRed tipped $50

It had been three months since he had stumbled upon Rich’s secret hustle and, in that time, he had somewhat established himself in the chat. Rich knew his screenname and would smile excitedly whenever it popped up onscreen. It still felt kind of weird, sending Rich messages under an anonymous username, but he felt less creepy than before. At least he was actually tipping instead of just lurking like the majority of the watchers. 

Before Michael knew it, the stream was ending. Rich was, as usual, kneeling in front of his camera and panting from exertion. The grin on his face made Michael’s heart flutter.  
“Before I go, I just wanna remind you all that I’m doing an extra show next week to celebrate hitting 10k followers! It’s gonna be a Q&A so come armed with questions and I will see you on Wednesday for that! Bye guys!” The stream cut off shortly after.

Michael sat back and shut his laptop. He had realised not long after he had started regularly watching that he would have to tell Rich about it at some point and he knew it would be better sooner rather than later. It was difficult to figure out how to tell him though, because Michael really didn’t want to destroy their friendship. Rich meant far too much to him for that and Michael knew that the warmth he felt when he was with Rich was something he wanted to preserve but, as things were, he just felt like a liar. 

\--

“Okay,” Rich began, settling back onto his bed and sticking his hand down the front of his pants. Michael snorted. Clearly things were going to be moving a bit faster than usual today. “As promised, this week is gonna be a Q&A. I hope you guys don’t mind but I might have a couple of questions for you too.”

Because he already knew Rich in real life, Michael wasn’t too bothered about the actual Q&A. Most of the questions about Rich would be stuff he already knew the answer too anyway. He still tuned in to the stream though, because he was pretty dedicated by that point. As usual, any of the residual guilt Michael felt in the face of watching his friend’s porn faded when Rich let out a little gasp and bit his lip. Michael’s dick was uncomfortably hard in his pants. His eyes glanced over to the chat.

AlphaSket tipped $20  
AlphaSket: u putting on ur lisp or is that shit real?

“First question! Is my lisp legit?’” He let out a short laugh. “Yeah it’s real. Trust me, if I had the choice, I wouldn’t speak like this.” He paused. “Well, actually, now that I think about it... I guess it’s a part of me that I’ve fought hard to accept. So maybe I wouldn’t get rid of it. I don’t know. Anyway it’s real.”

A_Jnsn tipped $50  
A_Jnsn: a bit personal but how did u get your scars?

“Oh, you wanna know how I got my scars huh? Wait, that makes me sound like the Joker. Fuck.” Rich cut himself off with a short laugh. “Sorry, I’ll take this seriously, I promise. I got caught in a house fire when I was seventeen. My friend literally jumped through a window and broke both legs to save me. It was a really hard time for everyone at school after that.” Michael watched as Rich ran his hands down his torso, paying particular attention to the mottled flesh of his scars as he went. It was surreal listening to him explain a story Michael had heard so many times, a story he had lived through, explained completely out of context to a crowd of strangers. None of them knew how bad it had really been; none of them had held a sobbing Rich in their arms as he choked on the memories of smoke. “But I’m fine now! I kinda like them too, they look cool.”

The chat pinged excitedly, messages flooding in about how interesting his scars were.

A_Jnsn: there really cute  
JJ_the_cat: they make u look sexy  
JJ_the_cat: fukin exotic

Michael had never quite gotten along with JJ, but it didn’t get to him too much as long as they both stayed in their lanes.

CodeRed: they’re a part of you. Proof you’ve lived and kept fighting  
CodeRed: your body is a canvas, prettyboy, and ur scars are the paint

Rich’s mouth curved up into a smile that was unusually gentle for his streams. “Thanks, Red. That’s really sweet. I never really thought about it like that.” He stopped and cleared his throat dramatically. “Anyway, enough of the soppy stuff. I’ve got a really great choice for you all today.”

The voting was between the two fan favourite toys and chat was alive in seconds, tipping furiously in a heated battle. It ended up with a very smug looking Rich – Michael could see from the chat that he made an absolute killing in that vote – kicking the losing dildo off the side of his bed. The one that was left was a twelve-inch red vibrator. Michael had voted for it on account of it being red and was irrationally satisfied when it won. Onscreen, Rich set about prepping himself, quickly taking his pants and boxers off and covering his fingers with lube. As he pressed one into himself, he turned half of his attention back to the chat.

“Okay, okay. Question time again. Here’s a couple – favourite colour? Hmmm, I’m gonna have to go with red. Most people think it’s an aggressive colour, but I think it’s calming. Favourite song? Ah, that’s a hard one. Bye, Bye, Bye by NSYNC? Don’t at me, it’s a banger and you all know it. Besides, it’s like, the bi anthem.”

He answered a more quickfire questions as he opened himself up, tiny moans interspersed throughout his replies. Finally, he finished and his sigh when he pulled out his fingers made Michael a little dizzy. 

“Okay, question for the chat! I’m probably going to regret asking but how old are you guys?”

The pure amount of answers over the age of 40 made Michael vaguely queasy. Rich was only just 19 and too many people were more than double that age.

CodeRed: 19

“Jeez, Red, are you joking? You’re, like, my age. I’ve gotta say, unless you’re bullshitting me, I was really expecting you to be a lot older.” Rich was lubing up the vibrator as he spoke. 

CodeRed: Nah, I just got cash to blow and ur pretty enough to be worth it

“Aw, thanks. You really are quite the gentleman tonight, Red.” 

JJ_the_cat tipped $20  
JJ_the_cat: are you single

Michael scowled. That was a power move, and he knew it.

“Oh, am I single? That’s awfully personal, don’cha think?” Rich responded, almost as soon as the question appeared. He laughed a little. “Yes... but it’s complicated.” 

That answer made Michael’s mind race. Wait, was Rich seeing someone? Why hadn’t he told him? Rich began to sink down onto the vibrator, legs quivering slightly as it breached his entrance.

JJ_the_cat: oh, is it like a casual fwb or an ex?

“JJ, that’s another question. You know the rules.”

JJ_the_cat tipped $20

“Neither. There’s this guy that I have been crazy about since freshman year. It’s kind of a bit sad that I haven’t gotten over him yet.” 

Michael’s brain was instantly kicked into top gear, thoughts barely coherent and heart beating hard in his chest. Whoever Rich was crushing on, Michael almost certainly knew them. He moved to the chat, hands shaking as he typed his question. The moment he hit send, Rich bottomed out, a desperate mewl escaping his lips.

CodeRed tipped $20  
CodeRed: tell us about him?

“Tell you about him? Are you guys really that interested in my love life?” Yes. “Aha, alright. Well… he’s just this super chill guy. Like, literally the most laid-back person I know but he’s also really hot. I remember seeing him in the hall for the first time and I literally tripped on my shoelaces and faceplanted into the floor because he distracted me so much.” Rich’s slight giggle morphed into an extremely wanton moan as he clicked the button on the vibrator’s remote control. He breathed out a string of curses, voice shaking and eyes fluttering closed for a few seconds. Biting his lip, he seemed to be trying to collect himself. “Hmmm, fuck. Ah! B-back to Mi- the guy I like. He’s the biggest fucking geek I’ve ever – oh shit! – I’ve ever met; like he’s super into vintage shit and video games, and – holy fuck – you wouldn’t believe how tall he is compared to me. He’s like six ten or something. Fuck- ah! And- and his hands are huge,” Michael watched intensely as Rich increased the vibration, brain short-circuiting at the mass of information it was receiving. “And I think he could probably do me some pretty serious damage, if you know what I mean…”

When Rich winked, Michael felt like he was going to pass out. There’s no way Rich wasn’t talking about him. An idea began to form in his head at an almost hysterical pace. It was a bad one for sure. He picked up his phone and flicked through to his contacts, where he hovered over Rich’s name. On screen, Rich had gone back to concentrating fully on fucking himself with the vibrator, and it was obvious that he was starting to come undone. His usual open-legged kneel had been replaced by him lying flat on his back as he breathlessly read out more of the questions and comments. A short string of these comments was what made Michael lose it completely.

JJ_the_cat: if he doesnt appreciate you he doesnt deserve u baby  
JJ_the_cat: you could b mine,  
JJ_the_cat: id fuck u so good

Michael saw red. An intense concentration suddenly came over him and he hit ‘call’.

There was a slight delay but, sure enough, Rich’s phone began to ring. It was familiar, a shitty trap remix of the pac-man theme that Rich had set as a joke. Michael smirked to himself as he saw Rich immediately becoming flustered. 

“Shit! Guys, that’s him calling,” the chat exploded, comments flooding in in an instant.

A_Jnsn: answer it  
Visitor442779445: do it!  
Slayer4394: omg phone sex time!

The general consensus was, inevitably, to pick up the call.

“You want me to answer? Okay, okay, fine. Fuck, I can’t believe I let you guys bully me into this.”

A few seconds before on-screen Rich picked up the call, Michael’s call was answered in real time. 

“Hi Rich!” 

“Hey!” The lack of Rich calling him by name would usually have struck Michael as mildly suspicious, but in this situation, it was obvious why. “What’s up?”  
Michael noticed how out of breath Rich sounded but didn’t mention it. He didn’t want to come off as overly perceptive.

“Nothing much. I’m bored out of my mind. Wednesday’s suck.” 

“Why don’t you just go out then?”

“Because parties are lame, Rich. Especially Wednesday parties. I don’t even know why I wanted to go to them in high school.”

Michael couldn’t focus on the chat. All his mind was fixated on was keeping his cool and watching as Rich tried to muffle his moans.

“Then play Apocalypse of the Damned or Frogger or something?”

“You that desperate to get out of this conversation, huh? You always make fun of me for playing AotD.” Michael teased, watching as Rich roughly thrust the toy further into himself.

“Nah man, I’m just- ah!”

A laugh bubbled its way from Michael’s lips before he could stop it.

“Oh shit, dude, am I interrupting something?”

“N-no.” 

“Uh huh. So, you’ve just been out of breath this whole time for nothing and that sound was just- “

“Okay, okay, I get it. You might have been interrupting something...”

Seeing how Rich looked on-screen, Michael knew he wasn’t going to last long. He typed a message into the chat and waited. 

“Ha! Well, I should probably let you get back to that.” He pressed send. 

CodeRed: Cum for me, prettyboy

“Wouldn’t want you to-”

Rich let out one of the neediest, most fucked out moans Michael had ever heard. The delay meant that a beat passed between the noise and the video feed of Rich seeing the comment, flushing red, and immediately cumming all over his stomach and bedsheets.

“I guess you’re done then.” Even if he hadn’t been able to Rich’s face on his laptop, he would have known the exact expression he was pulling, that one that was halfway between a scowl and a pout. 

“Shut up, asshole!”

“Ha, I guess I should probably leave you to clean up then. Catch ya later,” Michael said, trying not to let his voice catch as he watched Rich panting and covered in lube. He had successfully asserted himself as king of the chat, as well as proved his superiority over that JJ bastard. An uncharacteristic burst of confidence passed through him. Before he hung up, he added a “prettyboy” in a low voice and ended the call.

He got to see, in delayed time, the fallout. Rich began to say ‘bye’, then stopped, realising exactly what Michael had said.

“Hold up a- Oh he hung up.” He turned to look directly into the camera. “So that was interesting. I know you didn’t all hear the other side of that call, but I think I have some conversations to start pretty soon. And I guess I have to say thank you Red for that wonderful addition.” Rich’s eyes seemed to burn through the camera, his gaze fiery and intense. Michael could practically feel that glare melting a hole in him. There was no way Rich didn’t know he was watching now. “Anyway, I’d better end this there. See you guys as usual on Friday. Bye!” 

Rich still looked thoroughly jilted as he reached forward to flick off the camera. The whole chat was buzzing with questions about the call, a conversation that continued in the comments even after the stream had ended. 

Michael’s phone rang but his previous boldness had long since been depleted and he was suddenly very afraid of the consequences of his little stunt. He panicked and let it ring out. A few seconds later, it rang again. After a moment of deliberation, he made the executive decision not to answer. Instead, he buried himself in his duvet and lay there freaking out until he fell asleep. 

—

In the morning, Michael woke to the blaring of his alarm and the feeling of dread in his stomach. Uncertainty rolled around in his head, rattling like a loose marble, and infecting all his thoughts. He wanted nothing more than to just stay in bed instead of having to ger up and face the day ahead of him, but he had a lecture at ten and it was nine fifteen. Reluctantly, he pushed himself up, reaching for his glasses and phone. Sixteen missed calls and one text from Rich, and a reminder from Jeremy that they were meeting at the mall after class. Michael felt a bit nauseous from fear and doubt, but he wasn’t an idiot. He knew that ignoring Rich and not checking the message would only make things so much worse, so he took a deep breath and unlocked his phone. 

Short stack: Hey Michael. I guess you saw my calls. Just wanted to let you know I’m going to sleep now but I’m not just going to let this go. We need to talk. Properly, not texting. See you tomorrow. Sleep well.

Michael l didn’t know whether to feel relieved or even more scared by the message. Rich didn’t seem angry but that didn’t mean he wasn’t. Anxiety was tying Michael’s intestines into knots. This was the most nervous he had been about anything in a while; he had never been in a situation even remotely like this before. 

He sighed, dropping his head into his hands. There was nothing he could do about it for the moment so, like Christine used to tell him, he needed to put it to the back of his mind and let it rest until there was something he could do about it. Worrying wouldn’t help. Knowing that, though, didn’t alleviate the tight feeling in his chest, and he was still feeling jittery when he left his apartment. The feeling didn’t go away; even as he sat through his professor’s droning and stared blankly at the screen of his laptop, he could feel the twisting in his gut. 

Finally, it was time to meet Jeremy and Michael wanted nothing more than to just spew all his problems to his best friend over slushies and then play DDR in the arcade until his legs went numb. He manages at least two of those things, laughing giddily as Jeremy leaned on the arcade machine, their nearly empty cups of melted slushie in hand as they both tried to catch their breath. 

“Told you I’d beat your twink ass into the ground.” Michael said with a grin. Jeremy laughed, dissolving into coughs halfway through much to their mutual amusement. It was just like old times, and Michael’s conundrum had almost slipped his mind entirely. That was until they had both stopped laughing, anyway. As their giggles died down, Jeremy’s face suddenly turned serious, one hand coming to rest on Michael’s shoulder. Unease spiked in Michael’s head.

“I wasn’t sure how to bring it up, dude, but you’ve been acting a bit off lately. Actually, I wasn’t going to say anything at all because I hate being overbearing and annoying and I know you’d come to me if there was something was up but…” Jeremy’s head was tilted to one side, eyebrows drawn together in concern as he looked up at Michael. “Is everything alright?”

“It’s fine, Jer. Everything is-” Michael paused as Jeremy’s frown deepened. “Shit. I can’t lie to you. I think I might have messed up. Like, properly fucked something up completely. I don’t know how it happened; I was like just lost my filter for a second and now I think the guy I like might hate me.”

It was risky telling Jeremy. He hadn’t even told him that he had a crush in the first place and he really didn’t want his best friend feeling like he didn’t trust him. But Jeremy’s reaction was far from negative.

“That’s it? Wait, I don’t mean that in a trivialising your problems way, oh my gosh please don’t take it like that. I just mean that you could probably kill someone in front of Rich and he’d still forgive you.”

“I really don’t think you understand the magnitude of my fuck up, my du- wait how the hell do you know it’s Rich?”

Jeremy looked at him like he was crazy.

“Are you kidding? You stare at him like he invented the sun. Seriously, you don’t make it difficult.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“I’m uh… I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier dude.”

Jeremy smiled warmly. “It’s fine, Micah. I knew you’d tell me when you were ready.”

“Thanks dude,”

“No problem.”

They stood in comfortable silence for a moment. Jeremy’s phone buzzed and he quickly checked it, expression unreadable as he did so. As he shoved it back into his pocket, he looked back up at Michael.

“Hey, d’you wanna get going? Someone just reminded me of a paper I’ve got to write for tomorrow.”

“Sure thing, dude.

\--

Jeremy offered to walk Michael back to his dorm, an offer Michael had tried to turn down to no avail. He thought it would be better for Jeremy to get straight back to start his paper, but Jeremy was having none of it, insisting that they walk together. As they approached, Michael could feel the anxiety returning. He knew that being home alone was going to give him plenty of time to ruminate and make his problem seem worse and he really wasn’t looking forward to his fear to come back in full force. Jeremy was rapidly typing something on his phone as they approached the dorm, almost missing Michael’s agitated expression. When they got to the door, Jeremy slipped his phone away once more and pulled Michael into a hug.

“Everything is going to be fine, Micah. We’ll get though whatever the situation is like we always do.” He let go of Michael and they smiled at each other, before splitting off to go their separate ways. 

As Jeremy walked off down the corridor, he turned and yelled over his shoulder.

“Good luck, dude. I believe in you.”

Halfway through the entrance already, Michael threw back a “thanks!” and closed the door behind himself, leaning against it with his eyes shut as he tried to process his thoughts. The moment was cut short, however, when a voice broke through the silence.

“Hey Michael.” 

Lounging on the couch, legs crossed over and propped up on the coffee table, was the exact person Michael had been wanting to not think about. Rich was looking directly at him, and Michael jumped back in surprise. 

“Holy shit! How did you get in here?”

Rich rolled his eyes and pushed himself up. 

“You gave me a key, dude. Figured I might as well use it.”

“Oh yeah.” Michael remembered getting spare keys cut for Rich and Jeremy, just in case. Neither of them had actually used them, so he’d forgotten about it. “Why are you here?”  
An incredulous look swept across Rich’s face and Michael felt like slamming his own head in the door. “You’re kidding,” Rich said in the most deadpan voice Michael had ever heard. “C’mon. Let’s just go to your room and talk about this.”

“My room?”

“Oh for f- Not like that, Michael. Do you really want to talk about this somewhere where your roommates could walk in at any point?”

“Right. Yeah, sure. Sure. We can go talk about it there. Sounds… great.” 

“Cool.”

Rich was already walking away, clearly moving with purpose, and Michael followed after him, dread once again building up. As soon as the door to his room closed behind them, Rich threw himself down on the bed and groaned tragically and covered his face with his hands.

“Look, Michael,” he began, his voice shaking. “I know this is really weird and you’re probably going to be uncomfortable around me for a while, but I really don’t want to ruin my shot at being your friend. Are we still cool? Can we still be cool?” 

The atmosphere in the room was painfully awkward but Michael’s brain still decided to highlight the fact that Rich was laying on his bed. In any other situation, that would probably be considered an instant victory but now Michael just felt bad for even thinking it.

“Yeah, we’re cool. Why would we not be?”

That seemed to be the wrong answer. Rich let out an exasperated noise, somewhere between a growl and a defeated sigh. He sat up, looking Michael dead in the eye with a look so sharp Michael could practically feel it slicing through his retinas.

“You saw the stream; you know how I feel, goddamn it!” Rich was breathing heavily, voice cracking on the last syllable, and Michael could see the tell-tale gloss of tears forming. “I know you’re trying to be chill about this but don’t pretend nothing happened because it did! I thought I could keep this whole thing a secret. Everything. I wanted to deal with it all in my own fucking time so I wouldn’t fuck things up. You weren’t supposed to find out I’m a fucking cam boy. You weren’t supposed to find out that I’ve been pining over you since the beginning of time. You definitely weren’t supposed to find out that I’ve been thinking about how good you’d wreck me if we ever hooked up. You were never supposed to find out and I’m sorry. That’s why we shouldn’t be fucking cool, Mell. Because I’m a freak.”

Everything seemed to slow down a little as Michael’s brain unpicked Rich’s words. He knew from how Jeremy vented that irrational fear and self-hatred were easy to come by, he felt it all too often himself, but Rich was on a whole new level and it was like a punch to the stomach knowing that he was thinking that way. He sat down on the end of the bed, far enough away from Rich that he didn’t feel like he was invading his personal space.

“There’s nothing wrong with any of that Rich. It’s a job and one that you’re damn good at too. Like, did you miss the part where I watched every video you’ve done for the last… god knows how long, or are you just ignoring it?

“Michael you don’t need to humour me. Just call me a slag like anyone else would.”

“Rich, are you hearing me? I just said I like spending my Friday evenings thinking about fucking you and you’re just going to self-deprecate yourself into denying it?”

That did it. 

Rich’s expression went from something close to utter despair to a blank slate in less than half a second. He fell completely silent, eyes widening and shooting up to meet Michael’s. 

“You what?”

If god was real, he was out to test Michael’s patience and self-control.

“I watch your livestream every week because I want in your pants and that was the only way I was going to see you without clothes.”

“Oh. That’s…”

“A horrific invasion of privacy and crushing breach of trust? Yeah, and yet you’re the one apologising to me.”

“Damn, dude. I didn’t even think about it like that.”

“Well, are you thinking about it like that now?” Michael was terrified of the answer to that, if he was being honest, but he’d accept however Rich felt.

“No. Not really.”

“What are you thinking about it, then?”

Rich bit his lip, shuffling closer to Michael on the bed. One of his hands rose to Michael’s chin, guiding him down until their faces were level. Michael’s heart was pounding again, faster and harder than before and there must have been a huge rush of blood to his head because he was suddenly feeling dizzy as he stared into Rich’s determined eyes.

“I’m thinking that if I like you and you like me, then maybe we should be doing something about that.”

Michael’s gaze flickered down for a fraction of a second, running along the curve of Rich’s lips, before returning upwards. He leaned in slightly, hands coming to rest on Rich’s hips, and Rich met him halfway. They kissed slowly at first, chaste and gentle as their lips brushed. Michael could feel Rich’s smile against his own and he pushed forwards into it, letting the tips of his fingers slip underneath Rich’s shirt. He deepened the kiss, biting Rich’s lip. Rich’s hands found their way to Michael’s collar, pulling him closer until they overbalanced and fell backwards. From there, it was a mess of tongues and teeth and tangled limbs, and the tight feeling in Michael’s chest was replaced by a feeling of contentment that spread through his body like an electrical current.

\--

“Hey everyone! We have a very special show this evening.” 

As usual, Rich began the stream by kneeling in the centre of his bed. He wore a black harness with matching underwear, and a pair of ripped jeans over the top – the same outfit, he was reliably informed, as the first time Michael had ever watched him.

“As some of you have noticed, one very active follower has been missing from the chat recently. Since last month, actually, around when I made my 10K special.” Rich was beaming like an idiot – he could see it in the feed on his laptop – but he really couldn’t help it. “That was also the video where my long-time crush called me halfway through and said active follower made me jizz while still on the phone. The more observant of you may have joined the dots between those two events.” There was a snigger from offscreen. “Oh, shut up, you. Anyway, long story short, here’s my boyfriend!”

Michael launched himself onto the bed, knocking Rich over, and the two of them burst out laughing. Rich pressed a fleeting kiss to Michael’s lips before looking back to the camera. 

“Everyone say hi! This is CodeRed, one of my most loyal tippers and one of my best friends from high school.”

“Sup’ y’all.”Michael shot a peace sign to the camera. 

“You are awful.”

“Only for you, babe.” A quick glance at the chat showed a flurry of comments, half tips and half commenting on how hot this new guy was. Michael laughed and kissed Rich again, one hand resting on his chest, and Rich let himself go limp against Michael’s body. They broke apart after a few seconds and Rich turned back to the chat, letting out a giggle at the comments.

“Okay, okay. We’ll stop our gross flirting. Although, the tip jar says you guys might want otherwise… Anyway, let’s get serious.” He turned to Michael, shuffling around to straddle his waist. “Red, honey, what’s the baseline amount to see me choking on your dick?”

**Author's Note:**

> Well that was fun. And a complete mess. 
> 
> I feel like the lack of properly written porn makes this entire fic one huge cock block but that seems like a not me problem lmao. Probably because I've had one (1) vaguely sexual encounter and I'm pretty sure it put me off sex as a concept so clearly I was the right person to write this. ALright, oversharing aside, I hope you enjoyed this and don't forget to leave kudos and comments because I enjoy hearing from y'all <3


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